Controlling the Outcome of Your Communication

“That’s not what I said…”
“That’s not what I meant…”
“You’re not hearing me…”

You’ve probably said at least one of those three things at some point in communicating with your colleagues. At first pass, they may seem like simple objections, simple statements to help steer someone to the point you’re trying to make.

But if we look closer, those three elements — what was SAID, what was MEANT, and what was HEARD — are actually part of what makes a clear message. What happens if the three are in alignment? With a clear, well-prepared message, you have a good chance at the outcome you desire. If not, there’s room for your message to be misinterpreted.


As the animation above suggests, the better job we can do of making sure what we say is what we mean, the better chance our audience will hear our message as intended. When we don’t plan our messaging, it’s much more difficult to control the outcome of our communication. When we don’t prepare, our intention rarely matches up with reality of what we say, and rarely matches up with what our audience hears.

However, when we prepare our communication, practice our delivery, anticipate objections, and set our audience up to listen, there’s much more overlap among those three elements. There’s consistency, because what we mean to say actually gets said, and it is probably said well, so that is also what gets heard. As a result, we have a much better chance at getting the outcome we want.

Good luck!

We believe that great communication skills can change the world. We transform people and organizations with simple, repeatable techniques and mindsets. We teach persuasive communication skills through an integrated platform of corporate training, coaching, and asynchronous learning. And we are able to provide solutions to companies and non-profits of all sizes, through our teams at The Latimer Group and LatimerNext. To learn more about how we can transform your organization, e-mail us at

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Dean Brenner

A book about change

The Latimer Corporation’s CEO Dean Brenner is a noted keynote speaker and author on the subject of persuasive communication. He has written three books, including Persuaded, in which he details how communication can transform organizations into highly effective, creative, transparent environments that succeed at every level.